Can I start this post with a complaint?
And to make it worse, it is a SELF-INDUCED complaint.
My tummy hurts.
Bad.
Kept me up, moaning & groaning, feel like I swallowed a ton of horse poop and just wish I would implode bad.
And I know exactly why.
I ate a cookie last night.
Actually, it was four cookies.
Those dough log cookies.
A store brand log.
I know, it just gets worse & worse, doesn't t?
Did I mention that these were consumed around 11 pm?
My guy ate 'em too.
He feels equally as shitty.
(poor choice of words)
When will I learn?
When will I stop being manipulated by my monkey brain?
(pig brain is more like it in this case)
When will I step up to the awesome responsibility of honoring my body temple?
When will I learn to make the choices I know deep inside are the right ones, the best ones, for me-physically, mentally, psychologically, spiritually?
Did I mention PHYSICALLY?
Eating four chemical, sugar, fat, grease laden, God-knows-what-other-horribly-terrible-for-you ingredients chocolate chip (which likely contained no actual real chocolate whatsoever) cookies
was definitely NOT the best choice I could have made at 11 pm last night.
(or ever, actually)
A choice which started by reaching for that log at the grocery store.
NO-wait!
A choice which began when I had the desire for these cookies in the first place.
A desire, a want, a "I DESERVE A DAMN COOKIE!" moment.
*sigh*
And now I have been in great gastrinomical distress,
for almost 11 hours.
MMMM, warm from the oven, gooey ooey, mouth watering, chocolate chip cookies...
which have turned into some horror movie worthy ALIEN trying to gnaw it's way out of my abdomen all "Alien" like.
My post yesterday was about COMMITMENT to the things I yearn to BE(come) as my HIGHEST SELF.
My committment to align my BELIEFS with my ACTIONS.
ie: I believe that cookies are unhealthy for my body.
re: I choose not to eat cookies.
oops.
Thank you, universe, for testing me almost immediately after I put that intention out there.
(FAIL!)
Alright. I get it.
(damn, you're good!)
***************************************************************************
Time for some thankfulness...
* I am thankful that even though I was stupid enough to want, buy, make & eat those cookies,
I do NOT think that eating those cookies were worth what I am going through now.
* I am thankful that my body is smarter than my (pig) brain and has no problem with pointing that out to me in a very man-you-are-such-a-dumb-shit way now.
* I am thankful that I have free will to make my own choices.(ie: hopefully learning from the BAD ones and making a BETTER one next time)
* I am thankful that I currently have an abundance of healthy foods in my possesion.
Now excuse me, I have to go Google "how to make detox tea".
Happy (ish) Me-Laurie Z
Pig brain, ha ha I know that one!! Ah I know what you are saying ..I eat crap and then often feel crap after ...why do we d it?
ReplyDeleteI did the something similar when craving fish and chips like I had in New Zealand but ordered here in UT. I was so sick from the grease! I decided to pass on it in another restaurant on my birthday just to avoid what you described going through. It sure is a challenge to eat right!
ReplyDeleteAwwww....Detox tea, a great cleanser of my internal system. I am thankful I came across your post and you've remind me to drink one :))
ReplyDelete